I don't wanna see that!!!!

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Pham Nuwen
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Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by Pham Nuwen »

Wobbly wobbly timey wimey
Goddamn libertarian message board. Hugh Akston

leave me to my mescaline smoothie in peace, please. dhex

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Aresen
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Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by Aresen »

Some friends persuaded me to go see Jumanji2: The next level

It's a horrible, chaotic, unfunny film. Due to the 'gimmick' of the characters switching identities, extremely hard to follow who was who. Not that it mattered, because none of the characters had any real personality.

Utterly predictable plot. Boring dialogue which was mostly a series of set-ups and predictable punch lines. Very little to laugh at, though the annoying woman behind me giggled the whole time. (She was pretty well the only one laughing.)

Save your money and do not go.
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Ellie
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Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by Ellie »

"I would pay to read a book of just Cats reviews." https://twitter.com/nwi_jsp/status/1207455708834390016

"2019 has got to stop injecting dmt straight in the dick hole." - dhex

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Warren
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Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by Warren »

Ellie wrote:
19 Dec 2019, 11:47
"I would pay to read a book of just Cats reviews." https://twitter.com/nwi_jsp/status/1207455708834390016
nom nom nom
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JD
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Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by JD »

Ellie wrote:
19 Dec 2019, 11:47
"I would pay to read a book of just Cats reviews."
"'A furry orgy in a dumpster': what the reviews say about Cats"
https://www.theguardian.com/film/2019/d ... about-cats
I sort of feel like a sucker about aspiring to be intellectually rigorous when I could just go on twitter and say capitalism causes space herpes and no one will challenge me on it. - Hugh Akston

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Eric the .5b
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Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by Eric the .5b »

I kinda want to see Cats purely because of the hyperventilation. It's a plain PG movie, and people are talking about it like it's the uncensored cut of Eyes Wide Shut.

(But then, I encountered someone online yesterday who was horribly aggrieved that anyone out there considers TMNT "furry", notwithstanding that the original comic is right up there with Usagi Yojimbo and Albedo as one of the touchstones of the early anthropomorphic comic fandom.)
"Better that ten guilty persons escape than that one innocent suffer."
Cet animal est très méchant / Quand on l'attaque il se défend.

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Jennifer
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Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by Jennifer »

Ooh, I'm late to this party, but: I will probably watch Cats when it's on cable or some other free-to-me source, but even before I saw any reviews I had qualms when I heard they were going to do CGI for everything--IMO, that alone would be enough to doom the production even if the rest of the story was fine, because CGI cats are going to reside in the uncanny valley. No matter how advanced CGI tech becomes, or how talented a particular CGI artist might be, there's certain things that just aren't going to work as "realistic-live" action or a CGI equivalent. (Regarding Cats, I mentioned "realistic-live action" as opposed to the Broadway originals, which of course were "live-action," but THAT was very obviously "human actors wearing cat costumes and makeup." The Broadway cats aren't in the uncanny valley, the way CGI cats are.)
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JD
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Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by JD »

Last night I was talking to a friend who'd seen Cats, and she (like pretty much everybody else on the planet) described it as horrendously bad, in a "how did anyone ever think this was going to watchable" way. Not quite "uncensored cut of Eyes Wide Shut", but just absolutely everything about it being unwatchable - the acting, the CGI, the songs, the non-plot, etc. Still, we think some time we might have to get really high and see it.
I sort of feel like a sucker about aspiring to be intellectually rigorous when I could just go on twitter and say capitalism causes space herpes and no one will challenge me on it. - Hugh Akston

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Warren
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Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by Warren »

JD wrote:
13 Jan 2020, 12:42
Still, we think some time we might have to get really high and see it.
I hated Cats the theatrical musical. So I'm doubly uninterested in an unwatchable film version of it.
But most people said the same thing about Wachowski's Speed Racer and that turned out to be everything I dreamed it would.
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Painboy
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Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by Painboy »

JD wrote:
13 Jan 2020, 12:42
Last night I was talking to a friend who'd seen Cats, and she (like pretty much everybody else on the planet) described it as horrendously bad, in a "how did anyone ever think this was going to watchable" way. Not quite "uncensored cut of Eyes Wide Shut", but just absolutely everything about it being unwatchable - the acting, the CGI, the songs, the non-plot, etc. Still, we think some time we might have to get really high and see it.
Use caution.
It did occur to me that it would be a nightmare on its own, but I really wanted to see how extreme it could be. It turned out to be a hellworld of anxiety. Their terrifying faces and their demonic eyes were right in my face, like it was 3D. I could feel their CGI fur scratching me. I realize now that I have never seen a movie on mushrooms before, and I'm not sure I ever will again.
I was squirming in my seat, tears rolling down my face, and I kept blurting out yelps of anxious laughter every time a new nightmare creature appeared on the screen. Steph gave me her scarf to breathe into and muffle my reactions (no one else was laughing at any of it!!), and that helped comfort me a bit, until Rebel Wilson's cat appeared and spread her horny cat legs wide open, exposing what felt like a Sarlacc Pit of CGI fur, like I was staring into the abyss. I yelled "FUCK!" and spilled my popcorn when that happened. Certainly this couldn't be real? It couldn't be happening. Why was no one reacting? Was I hallucinating all of it? Was it just a normal film and I was the one creating the dancing cockroaches and the mice children and then she ZIPPED HER SKIN OPEN, WHY DID SHE ZIP HER SKIN OPEN?? That scene was fairly early in the film, and it was devastating. I could feel myself slipping, the movie wasn't funny anymore, because its relentless pace and movement just kept throwing more weird CGI-haired monsters at me and it didn't seem to have any plot or destination, just a ceaseless assault of cat people. I wondered if it would ever end, and wasn't sure if it had ever begun, if maybe it was just a gibberish world of horny fur demons swinging and dancing and singing about their space cult or whatever the fuck was happening.

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Ellie
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Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by Ellie »

The Rhythm Section looks like the kind of movie I'd enjoy in a lot of ways. But I'm pretty sure anything that starts with a mother losing all her kids is NOT something I need to see EVER EVER.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Uq_5bYGYoY
"2019 has got to stop injecting dmt straight in the dick hole." - dhex

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