I don't wanna see that!!!!

Music, books, movies, TV, games, hobbies, food, and potent potables. And forum games! Pour a drink, put on your smoking jacket, light a pipe (of whatever), and settle in.
User avatar
Pham Nuwen
Posts: 8648
Joined: 27 Apr 2010, 02:17

Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by Pham Nuwen »

Wobbly wobbly timey wimey
Goddamn libertarian message board. Hugh Akston

leave me to my mescaline smoothie in peace, please. dhex

User avatar
Aresen
Posts: 16949
Joined: 26 Apr 2010, 20:18
Location: Great White Pacific Northwest

Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by Aresen »

Some friends persuaded me to go see Jumanji2: The next level

It's a horrible, chaotic, unfunny film. Due to the 'gimmick' of the characters switching identities, extremely hard to follow who was who. Not that it mattered, because none of the characters had any real personality.

Utterly predictable plot. Boring dialogue which was mostly a series of set-ups and predictable punch lines. Very little to laugh at, though the annoying woman behind me giggled the whole time. (She was pretty well the only one laughing.)

Save your money and do not go.
If Trump supporters wanted a tough guy, why did they elect such a whiny bitch? - Mo

Those who know history are doomed to deja vu. - the innominate one

Never bring a knife to a joke fight" - dhex

User avatar
Ellie
Posts: 13189
Joined: 21 Apr 2010, 18:34

Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by Ellie »

"I would pay to read a book of just Cats reviews." https://twitter.com/nwi_jsp/status/1207455708834390016

"Yours is the much better comeback." -JD

User avatar
Warren
Posts: 29626
Joined: 26 Apr 2010, 17:03
Location: Goat Rope MO
Contact:

Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by Warren »

Ellie wrote:
19 Dec 2019, 11:47
"I would pay to read a book of just Cats reviews." https://twitter.com/nwi_jsp/status/1207455708834390016
nom nom nom
THIS SPACE FOR RENT

User avatar
JD
Posts: 11974
Joined: 05 May 2010, 15:26

Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by JD »

Ellie wrote:
19 Dec 2019, 11:47
"I would pay to read a book of just Cats reviews."
"'A furry orgy in a dumpster': what the reviews say about Cats"
https://www.theguardian.com/film/2019/d ... about-cats
I sort of feel like a sucker about aspiring to be intellectually rigorous when I could just go on twitter and say capitalism causes space herpes and no one will challenge me on it. - Hugh Akston

User avatar
Eric the .5b
Posts: 14799
Joined: 26 Apr 2010, 16:29

Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by Eric the .5b »

I kinda want to see Cats purely because of the hyperventilation. It's a plain PG movie, and people are talking about it like it's the uncensored cut of Eyes Wide Shut.

(But then, I encountered someone online yesterday who was horribly aggrieved that anyone out there considers TMNT "furry", notwithstanding that the original comic is right up there with Usagi Yojimbo and Albedo as one of the touchstones of the early anthropomorphic comic fandom.)
"Better that ten guilty persons escape than that one innocent suffer."
Cet animal est très méchant / Quand on l'attaque il se défend.

User avatar
Jennifer
Posts: 25618
Joined: 28 Apr 2010, 14:03

Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by Jennifer »

Ooh, I'm late to this party, but: I will probably watch Cats when it's on cable or some other free-to-me source, but even before I saw any reviews I had qualms when I heard they were going to do CGI for everything--IMO, that alone would be enough to doom the production even if the rest of the story was fine, because CGI cats are going to reside in the uncanny valley. No matter how advanced CGI tech becomes, or how talented a particular CGI artist might be, there's certain things that just aren't going to work as "realistic-live" action or a CGI equivalent. (Regarding Cats, I mentioned "realistic-live action" as opposed to the Broadway originals, which of course were "live-action," but THAT was very obviously "human actors wearing cat costumes and makeup." The Broadway cats aren't in the uncanny valley, the way CGI cats are.)
"Myself, despite what they say about libertarians, I think we're actually allowed to pursue options beyond futility or sucking the dicks of the powerful." -- Eric the .5b

User avatar
JD
Posts: 11974
Joined: 05 May 2010, 15:26

Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by JD »

Last night I was talking to a friend who'd seen Cats, and she (like pretty much everybody else on the planet) described it as horrendously bad, in a "how did anyone ever think this was going to watchable" way. Not quite "uncensored cut of Eyes Wide Shut", but just absolutely everything about it being unwatchable - the acting, the CGI, the songs, the non-plot, etc. Still, we think some time we might have to get really high and see it.
I sort of feel like a sucker about aspiring to be intellectually rigorous when I could just go on twitter and say capitalism causes space herpes and no one will challenge me on it. - Hugh Akston

User avatar
Warren
Posts: 29626
Joined: 26 Apr 2010, 17:03
Location: Goat Rope MO
Contact:

Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by Warren »

JD wrote:
13 Jan 2020, 12:42
Still, we think some time we might have to get really high and see it.
I hated Cats the theatrical musical. So I'm doubly uninterested in an unwatchable film version of it.
But most people said the same thing about Wachowski's Speed Racer and that turned out to be everything I dreamed it would.
THIS SPACE FOR RENT

User avatar
Painboy
Posts: 4557
Joined: 18 Feb 2013, 11:33
Location: Seattle

Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by Painboy »

JD wrote:
13 Jan 2020, 12:42
Last night I was talking to a friend who'd seen Cats, and she (like pretty much everybody else on the planet) described it as horrendously bad, in a "how did anyone ever think this was going to watchable" way. Not quite "uncensored cut of Eyes Wide Shut", but just absolutely everything about it being unwatchable - the acting, the CGI, the songs, the non-plot, etc. Still, we think some time we might have to get really high and see it.
Use caution.
It did occur to me that it would be a nightmare on its own, but I really wanted to see how extreme it could be. It turned out to be a hellworld of anxiety. Their terrifying faces and their demonic eyes were right in my face, like it was 3D. I could feel their CGI fur scratching me. I realize now that I have never seen a movie on mushrooms before, and I'm not sure I ever will again.
I was squirming in my seat, tears rolling down my face, and I kept blurting out yelps of anxious laughter every time a new nightmare creature appeared on the screen. Steph gave me her scarf to breathe into and muffle my reactions (no one else was laughing at any of it!!), and that helped comfort me a bit, until Rebel Wilson's cat appeared and spread her horny cat legs wide open, exposing what felt like a Sarlacc Pit of CGI fur, like I was staring into the abyss. I yelled "FUCK!" and spilled my popcorn when that happened. Certainly this couldn't be real? It couldn't be happening. Why was no one reacting? Was I hallucinating all of it? Was it just a normal film and I was the one creating the dancing cockroaches and the mice children and then she ZIPPED HER SKIN OPEN, WHY DID SHE ZIP HER SKIN OPEN?? That scene was fairly early in the film, and it was devastating. I could feel myself slipping, the movie wasn't funny anymore, because its relentless pace and movement just kept throwing more weird CGI-haired monsters at me and it didn't seem to have any plot or destination, just a ceaseless assault of cat people. I wondered if it would ever end, and wasn't sure if it had ever begun, if maybe it was just a gibberish world of horny fur demons swinging and dancing and singing about their space cult or whatever the fuck was happening.

User avatar
Ellie
Posts: 13189
Joined: 21 Apr 2010, 18:34

Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by Ellie »

The Rhythm Section looks like the kind of movie I'd enjoy in a lot of ways. But I'm pretty sure anything that starts with a mother losing all her kids is NOT something I need to see EVER EVER.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Uq_5bYGYoY
"Yours is the much better comeback." -JD

User avatar
Ellie
Posts: 13189
Joined: 21 Apr 2010, 18:34

Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by Ellie »

Li'l Ringo was playing with the Xbox controller and bought us a month of HBO Max on Hulu, so I tried to find something, anything, for the kids to watch to get some use out of it, and settled on Happy Feet 2. Woof. That is a turd. First of all, in the original the main character was a baby penguin, and I guess they thought they couldn't make him look too different in the sequel, but also he has to be an adult because it's about his son, so he's this freakishly large fluffy white mutant penguin next to all the regular black penguins. Second, another prominent character is a "Latin lover" stereotype voiced by Robin Williams. It feels like something from the 80s that didn't age well. There was lots more to hate but I've mercifully forgotten it. Thank goodness my kids got bored early on and we turned it off.
"Yours is the much better comeback." -JD

User avatar
Warren
Posts: 29626
Joined: 26 Apr 2010, 17:03
Location: Goat Rope MO
Contact:

Re: I don't wanna see that!!!!

Post by Warren »

Ellie wrote:
26 Jun 2020, 17:26
Li'l Ringo was playing with the Xbox controller and bought us a month of HBO Max on Hulu, so I tried to find something, anything, for the kids to watch to get some use out of it, and settled on Happy Feet 2. Woof. That is a turd. First of all, in the original the main character was a baby penguin, and I guess they thought they couldn't make him look too different in the sequel, but also he has to be an adult because it's about his son, so he's this freakishly large fluffy white mutant penguin next to all the regular black penguins. Second, another prominent character is a "Latin lover" stereotype voiced by Robin Williams. It feels like something from the 80s that didn't age well. There was lots more to hate but I've mercifully forgotten it. Thank goodness my kids got bored early on and we turned it off.
I'm surprised you didn't force Li'l Ringo to watch it, ala A Clockwork Orange style, all the way through as punishment for signing you up.
THIS SPACE FOR RENT

Post Reply