Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Thread

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Taktix®
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Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Thread

Post by Taktix® » 07 Nov 2014, 11:47

Because why not?

First up, this must be the happiest fight ever:

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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Ellie » 07 Nov 2014, 12:02

I'm willing to be converted to a hockey fan. What do you like about it? (Not being snarky! Genuinely curious!)
I should have listened to Warren. He was right again as usual.

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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Taktix® » 07 Nov 2014, 12:12

Ellie wrote:I'm willing to be converted to a hockey fan. What do you like about it? (Not being snarky! Genuinely curious!)
I will need to take time I don't have at work to answer this clearly, but for brevity's sake, what is your familiarity level with sports in general?
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Highway » 07 Nov 2014, 12:12

I paid attention to hockey for a while. Ultimately, tho, it's the same problem the NBA has: way too many games. There's no way sports like hockey and basketball should be playing 80 games in a season (baseball shouldn't be playing 162 either). Cut it in half. Cut the length of the season down by 3 months, either on the front end or the back end (or both ends: don't have hockey being played in June).

I also think that Hockey would benefit more from a system like the European soccer leagues use: multiple tiers. Cut it down to 20 teams, make another tier where the winners move up and the losers in the top league get knocked down.
"Sharks do not go around challenging people to games of chance like dojo breakers."

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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by lunchstealer » 07 Nov 2014, 12:26

Taktix® wrote:
Ellie wrote:I'm willing to be converted to a hockey fan. What do you like about it? (Not being snarky! Genuinely curious!)
I will need to take time I don't have at work to answer this clearly, but for brevity's sake, what is your familiarity level with sports in general?
I see hockey as being murdersoccer without the 0-0 ties. The beauty is when you start to understand the flow enough to see great plays developing. In basketball, scoring happens something like every other possession, so no individual scoring attempt has particularly high stakes, especially until the last 5 minutes of the game. In hockey, scoring is rare enough that an individual scoring attempt has higher stakes than in basketball. But unlike soccer, scoring isn't so rare that you can go to the kitchen to grab a beer or a soda, realize that there aren't any cold, put one in the freezer to cool down, wait for it to cool down, and bring it back to the TV with a good likelihood of not missing a real scoring opportunity.
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Ellie » 07 Nov 2014, 12:34

Taktix® wrote:
Ellie wrote:I'm willing to be converted to a hockey fan. What do you like about it? (Not being snarky! Genuinely curious!)
I will need to take time I don't have at work to answer this clearly, but for brevity's sake, what is your familiarity level with sports in general?
I like football and understand 90% of the rules/action, though I have trouble remembering what the positions are called and don't follow the strategy of it all. I am not especially familiar with any other sports, aside from a period in my misspent youth when I watched a lot of NASCAR because my boyfriend liked it. Liked NASCAR, I mean. He didn't give a shit whether I watched it or not. I didn't make great choices in my relationships. :lol:
I should have listened to Warren. He was right again as usual.

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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by tr0g » 07 Nov 2014, 12:36

Highway wrote:I paid attention to hockey for a while. Ultimately, tho, it's the same problem the NBA has: way too many games. There's no way sports like hockey and basketball should be playing 80 games in a season (baseball shouldn't be playing 162 either). Cut it in half. Cut the length of the season down by 3 months, either on the front end or the back end (or both ends: don't have hockey being played in June).

I also think that Hockey would benefit more from a system like the European soccer leagues use: multiple tiers. Cut it down to 20 teams, make another tier where the winners move up and the losers in the top league get knocked down.
I think MLB would benefit from a relegation system, too. Never happen, but it'd be fantastic if it did.
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Highway » 07 Nov 2014, 12:38

I will point out that the one single thing that may have staved off hockey's complete decline is HDTV. And even with that, the NHL is barely hanging on.
"Sharks do not go around challenging people to games of chance like dojo breakers."

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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Taktix® » 03 Dec 2014, 23:40

lunchstealer wrote:
Taktix® wrote:
Ellie wrote:I'm willing to be converted to a hockey fan. What do you like about it? (Not being snarky! Genuinely curious!)
I will need to take time I don't have at work to answer this clearly, but for brevity's sake, what is your familiarity level with sports in general?
I see hockey as being murdersoccer without the 0-0 ties. The beauty is when you start to understand the flow enough to see great plays developing. In basketball, scoring happens something like every other possession, so no individual scoring attempt has particularly high stakes, especially until the last 5 minutes of the game. In hockey, scoring is rare enough that an individual scoring attempt has higher stakes than in basketball. But unlike soccer, scoring isn't so rare that you can go to the kitchen to grab a beer or a soda, realize that there aren't any cold, put one in the freezer to cool down, wait for it to cool down, and bring it back to the TV with a good likelihood of not missing a real scoring opportunity.
This.

Reasons why it's better than other sports:

1. It's crazy international. Any given team might have a few guys who speak English, French, Swedish, Finnish, Russian, German, Czech, etc.
2. The NHL doesn't hold a monopoly. The Russian hockey league is always trying to snatch away players. (Markets!)
3. The recent implementation of a salary cap means that the Red Wings can no longer buy up all the good players (a la the Yankees), and rule changes stopped a play called a neutral zone trap that turned the game into a snoozefest in the early oughts.
4. Thanks to ESPN's snubbing, hockey has a much more developed internet culture. The Pensblog, for instance, can be really funny at times: thepensblog.com
5. Last year, Penguins forward Pascal Dupuis pulled out his own tooth on the bench and stayed in like nothing happened:

6. All my teammates in high school hockey were regularly engaging in interstate commerce.
7. Dented the gender barrier: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manon_Rh%C3%A9aume
8. Canadians dig it.
9. Female fans are called puck bunnies, and that sounds hot.
10. With a few exceptions, the players don't make a whole lot in relation to football or basketball, so they tend to be more down-to-earth. And they're typically not all artificially buff and mutant-looking like football players.

11. During the playoffs, if you have an emotional stake in a team, it's one of the most thrilling things to watch in the world. No shootout bullshit, games go until someone wins, and unless it's a blowout, you're on the edge of your seat the whole time.

12. One great player can't make such a singular impact like in other sports; teamwork has more emphasis.
13. Highway may be right in that there are too many games, but tickets are usually cheaper and easier to come by and going to a game is lots of fun.
14. I can typically find live streams for the cost of free (like front row sports dot com, just make sure you have adblock running and maybe disable flash autoplay). Sometimes these streams feature alien foreign commercials.
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by pistoffnick » 04 Dec 2014, 09:32

I prefer college hockey because:
A) U of MN - Duluth is usually near the top of the rankings
B) there is aggressive play, but none of the silly fighting you see in the pro leagues. If I want to see fighting, I'll watch MMA.
C) local kids doing well
D) the local station will usually carry the games, you can see more of the action on TV, don't have to deal with parking (but you miss the snarky chants coming from the student seats)
E) the skating is incredible. I can't skate forward worth shit, these guys can skate backwards, forwards, sideways all while getting shoved, checked, tripped, etc.
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Mo » 04 Dec 2014, 09:58

I like the fighting, it minimized on the field (ice) bullshit. If you could fight in the NBA or soccer, flopping would go way down. If you could fight in the NFL, you could cut down on dirty plays without giving recievers and QBs touch football protections.
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Taktix® » 13 Dec 2014, 00:53

So, do they not vaccinate for mumps in Canada? Because it's going around a bunch of healthy adults right now:

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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Mo » 13 Dec 2014, 10:21

Adults are really bad at taking booster shots.
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Warren » 14 Dec 2014, 11:01

Until the NHL is willing to ban fighting (suspend for life on third offence) hockey will always be closer to pro wrestling than an actual sport. Which is a pity, because college and international hockey is a damned fine sport.
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Highway » 14 Dec 2014, 11:29

Yeah, I'm with Warren here. I don't see where the fighting in hockey has gotten rid of either flopping, cheap shots or tickytack rules on fouls, and does anyone even fight except for the designated goons? It's just a sideshow and detracts from the rest of the game.
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by D.A. Ridgely » 14 Dec 2014, 17:40

I've never seen a hockey game but Slap Shot was a much better movie than I thought it was going to be.

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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Taktix® » 04 Feb 2015, 22:47

The have been rumors again that Jaromir Jagr might be traded back to the Penguins (once a great in the 90's alongside Lemieux, then left a while ago, now at the end of his career). The Pensblog is doing this exquisitely clever series of .gifs once a day called #JagrWatch:

Image

Image

Image
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by pistoffnick » 09 Mar 2015, 11:59

Ladies and Gentlemen,
In honor of Duluth East making it to the class AA championship,
I present to you
The 2015 Minnesota All-Hockey Hair Team


I have been known to sport the "dual exhaust" from time to time.
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Taktix® » 09 Mar 2015, 12:27

BTW, Ellie, if you're still looking to jump on the bandwagon, the Minnesota Wild are having somewhat of a Cinderella year under a new head coach, and went from a mediocre team to a team very likely to make the playoffs...
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by lunchstealer » 10 Mar 2015, 01:02

pistoffnick wrote:Ladies and Gentlemen,
In honor of Duluth East making it to the class AA championship,
I present to you
The 2015 Minnesota All-Hockey Hair Team


I have been known to sport the "dual exhaust" from time to time.
And because of this, I'm watching Strange Brew again. It's a beauty, eh?
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Taktix® » 10 Mar 2015, 01:21

lunchstealer wrote:
pistoffnick wrote:Ladies and Gentlemen,
In honor of Duluth East making it to the class AA championship,
I present to you
The 2015 Minnesota All-Hockey Hair Team
[videokilledtheradiostar]

I have been known to sport the "dual exhaust" from time to time.
And because of this, I'm watching Strange Brew again. It's a beauty, eh?
Take off, you hoser!
"Guilty as charged. Go ahead and ban me from the mall." - Ellie

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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Taktix® » 20 Apr 2015, 16:29

In honor of the Penguins barely making the playoffs and holding their own in a very David/Goliath matchup vs. the Rangers, I give you this cute gif:

Image
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Fin Fang Foom » 11 May 2015, 10:26

The only thing that matters to me in hockey happened again. Canada has failed to win the Stanley Cup for the 22nd year in a row.

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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Warren » 11 May 2015, 10:28

Fin Fang Foom wrote:The only thing that matters to me in hockey happened again. Canada has failed to win the Stanley Cup for the 22nd year in a row.
Does that make you happy, or sad?
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Taktix® » 11 May 2015, 10:35

Montreal, the epicenter for French Canadian awfulness, is still in it...
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