Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Thread

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Tundra
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Tundra » 14 Feb 2017, 14:03

Thanks, Otter! That was excellent.

Do any of you guys still play?

This is a fantastic series out of Canada that almost happened. Whoever wrote it has definitely spent some quality time around the old man leagues.

The Beer League

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R1eDw1Qa4sY

There are a bunch of episodes if you click on their YT handle.

Enjoy!

Oh, NSFW.

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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by pistoffnick » 15 Feb 2017, 09:17

I never could skate very well - my ankles were prone to rolling over. I was a demon at broomball, though.
Always be suspicious of people who have, or crave, power. - Stanley Kubrick
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Taktix®
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Taktix® » 15 Feb 2017, 09:22

I played a couple years in high school (RW, 2nd line), but it was like a men's rec league for teenagers rather than an organized school function (got moved to Raleigh, NC during high school). I wasn't a strong skater, but I scored a few goals and knew how to leverage people into a good check for a guy who weighs like 130 lbs soaking wet...
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pistoffnick
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by pistoffnick » 15 Feb 2017, 09:25

There is a league here at work. Friday afternoon the whole engineering floor is pretty much gone to hockey. It really sucks when I'm trying to get a test done and need an engineer to witness.
Always be suspicious of people who have, or crave, power. - Stanley Kubrick
"Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under." - H.L. Mencken
"The welfare of humanity is always the alibi of tyrants." - Albert Camus

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Tundra
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Tundra » 15 Feb 2017, 16:56

pistoffnick wrote:I never could skate very well - my ankles were prone to rolling over. I was a demon at broomball, though.
Ah, yes, the sport of (drunken) Kings.

I was a goalie for a few years after college. My god, what a clusterfuck that was. I saw more fighting in one season of broomball than in my 40+ years of hockey.

Fun game, though.

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Tundra
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Tundra » 18 Feb 2017, 10:46

Jagr sold his soul to the devil. It's the only way he can still be doing this:


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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by pistoffnick » 13 Mar 2017, 13:16

MN High School hockey is once again over. Flow on, brah!

Always be suspicious of people who have, or crave, power. - Stanley Kubrick
"Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under." - H.L. Mencken
"The welfare of humanity is always the alibi of tyrants." - Albert Camus

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Taktix®
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Taktix® » 13 Mar 2017, 15:12

Tundra wrote:Jagr sold his soul to the devil. It's the only way he can still be doing this:

Pretty amazing, but to be fair, anyone that's not named Jagr, Crosby, Toews or McDavid would have been called for a slash there...
"Guilty as charged. Go ahead and ban me from the mall." - Ellie

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Kolohe
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Kolohe » 17 Apr 2017, 21:47

So are the Caps gonna be a first round choke again? The top seed vs the bottom seed shouldn't be going to 3 straight overtime games, right?
when you wake up as the queen of the n=1 kingdom and mount your steed non sequiturius, do you look out upon all you survey and think “damn, it feels good to be a green idea sleeping furiously?" - dhex

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Highway
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Highway » 17 Apr 2017, 21:50

Kolohe wrote:So are the Caps gonna be a first round choke again? The top seed vs the bottom seed shouldn't be going to 3 straight overtime games, right?
They wouldn't be the Caps if they didn't choke. Although usually they have to struggle to the Pens and then choke.
"Sharks do not go around challenging people to games of chance like dojo breakers."

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Kolohe
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Kolohe » 17 Apr 2017, 23:31

Highway wrote:
Kolohe wrote:So are the Caps gonna be a first round choke again? The top seed vs the bottom seed shouldn't be going to 3 straight overtime games, right?
They wouldn't be the Caps if they didn't choke. Although usually they have to struggle to the Pens and then choke.
Well, Canadians also have experience burning Washington.
when you wake up as the queen of the n=1 kingdom and mount your steed non sequiturius, do you look out upon all you survey and think “damn, it feels good to be a green idea sleeping furiously?" - dhex

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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by D.A. Ridgely » 18 Apr 2017, 16:00

Kolohe wrote:
Highway wrote:
Kolohe wrote:So are the Caps gonna be a first round choke again? The top seed vs the bottom seed shouldn't be going to 3 straight overtime games, right?
They wouldn't be the Caps if they didn't choke. Although usually they have to struggle to the Pens and then choke.
Well, Canadians also have experience burning Washington.
Yeah, but I think Washington ended up winning that tournament.

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Mo
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Mo » 18 Apr 2017, 16:16

D.A. Ridgely wrote:
Kolohe wrote:
Highway wrote:
Kolohe wrote:So are the Caps gonna be a first round choke again? The top seed vs the bottom seed shouldn't be going to 3 straight overtime games, right?
They wouldn't be the Caps if they didn't choke. Although usually they have to struggle to the Pens and then choke.
Well, Canadians also have experience burning Washington.
Yeah, but I think Washington ended up winning that tournament.
At best Washington got a draw.
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Kolohe
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Kolohe » 27 Apr 2017, 21:57

Not sure if I've asked this question before

Is there some sort of rule that if you drop your stick, you're not allowed to pick it up yourself? I'm wondering why I sometimes see orphan sticks lying about on the ice.
when you wake up as the queen of the n=1 kingdom and mount your steed non sequiturius, do you look out upon all you survey and think “damn, it feels good to be a green idea sleeping furiously?" - dhex

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Highway
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Highway » 27 Apr 2017, 22:35

No, there's no rule like that, it's more that it's frequently easier to skate past the bench and have someone hand you a stick than to try to pick it up off the ice.
"Sharks do not go around challenging people to games of chance like dojo breakers."

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Taktix®
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Taktix® » 28 Apr 2017, 00:03

It's one of those rules like "always jump on a fumble" that's just been around forever. Supposedly, it's better that you continue playing without your stick than to get out of position to retrieve your stick. This may be obvious for goalies (if you're referring this sequence from tonight's game:
) but I always thought it was a little outdated for regular skaters. I guess you can still block shots and dislodge attempted screens without a stick. But no official rule or penalty or anything.

There is a rule that you must drop a broken stick immediately...
"Guilty as charged. Go ahead and ban me from the mall." - Ellie

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Kolohe
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Kolohe » 28 Apr 2017, 17:33

Thanks for the answer, that makes sense.

Yeah, that flurry in front of fleury was later in the game, and it was clear that grabbing his stick would leave a big gapping hole in the net.

There was something in the first period (where a Caps defender was skating arounf without his stick but the Pens didn't score) that caught my attention. Then another case in the second iirc where a stick was in front of one of the benches for about a minute.
when you wake up as the queen of the n=1 kingdom and mount your steed non sequiturius, do you look out upon all you survey and think “damn, it feels good to be a green idea sleeping furiously?" - dhex

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Ellie
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Ellie » 30 Apr 2017, 11:28

While we're talking about sticks, is that Red Green advice "Keep your stick on the ice" a hockey reference, and what does it mean? Don't start fights?
I should have listened to Warren. He was right again as usual.

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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Warren » 30 Apr 2017, 11:46

Ellie wrote:While we're talking about sticks, is that Red Green advice "Keep your stick on the ice" a hockey reference, and what does it mean? Don't start fights?
OMG I haven't seen Red Green in years. I'm pretty sure "Keep your stick on the ice" is the hockey equivalent to "Keep your eye on the ball", if you lift your stick you won't be able to stop the puck should it come whizzing by.
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Ellie
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Ellie » 30 Apr 2017, 12:19

Warren wrote:OMG I haven't seen Red Green in years
Me either, but I love it with an unironic fervor that will never wane.

I also still quote it a lot :mrgreen:
I should have listened to Warren. He was right again as usual.

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Taktix®
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Taktix® » 01 May 2017, 10:16

Warren wrote:
Ellie wrote:While we're talking about sticks, is that Red Green advice "Keep your stick on the ice" a hockey reference, and what does it mean? Don't start fights?
OMG I haven't seen Red Green in years. I'm pretty sure "Keep your stick on the ice" is the hockey equivalent to "Keep your eye on the ball", if you lift your stick you won't be able to stop the puck should it come whizzing by.
Yep, pretty much. One should keep the stick on the ice because:

1. You might a get a pass suddenly if the play changes or there's a turnover
2. When defending, sticks on the ice clog up passing lanes and disrupt the other team's breakout*
3. If the puck is played above the shoulders with a stick, it stops play (1/2 safety/1/2 to prevent it turning into lacrosse)
4. It's more likely to accidentally whack someone (and incur a high-sticking or hooking or spearing penalty) if you're just holding your stick up off the ice


*Breakout: a semi-planned play to get the puck from your end into your opponent's end and be set up to score.
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Kolohe
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Kolohe » 01 May 2017, 20:45

That was a weird instant replay process.
when you wake up as the queen of the n=1 kingdom and mount your steed non sequiturius, do you look out upon all you survey and think “damn, it feels good to be a green idea sleeping furiously?" - dhex

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Kolohe
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Kolohe » 01 May 2017, 22:27

That was a terrible 48 seconds
when you wake up as the queen of the n=1 kingdom and mount your steed non sequiturius, do you look out upon all you survey and think “damn, it feels good to be a green idea sleeping furiously?" - dhex

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Kolohe
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Kolohe » 01 May 2017, 22:46

Finally, the caps catch a break.
when you wake up as the queen of the n=1 kingdom and mount your steed non sequiturius, do you look out upon all you survey and think “damn, it feels good to be a green idea sleeping furiously?" - dhex

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Kolohe
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Re: Taktix®'s Annual Doomed Attempt at a Hockey Thread Threa

Post by Kolohe » 06 May 2017, 19:53

Oh yeah, two line passes have been legal for a while now, haven't they?
when you wake up as the queen of the n=1 kingdom and mount your steed non sequiturius, do you look out upon all you survey and think “damn, it feels good to be a green idea sleeping furiously?" - dhex

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