Light laffs

Music, books, movies, TV, games, hobbies, food, and potent potables. And forum games! Pour a drink, put on your smoking jacket, light a pipe (of whatever), and settle in.
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dhex
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Re: Light laffs

Post by dhex » 11 Oct 2018, 16:41

I'd always ask as well.
"I do wear my New Balance tennis shoes when I'm wearing cargo shorts, though, because truth in advertising." - lunch

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JD
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Re: Light laffs

Post by JD » 11 Oct 2018, 16:48

Warren wrote:
11 Oct 2018, 16:21
JD wrote:
11 Oct 2018, 15:33
From a Craigslist posting:
IF ITS POSTED DONT ASK IF ITS AVAILABLE STUPID ASS
Amen, sir, amen.
Because no one has ever left their craigslist post up after they sold their item?
Yeah, I know. It does happen a lot. (Although listings also expire, so...) But it's amusing to see somebody making a point of saying that they do the right thing.
"Millennials are lazy. They'd rather have avocado toast than cave in a man's skull with a tire iron!" -FFF

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Warren
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Re: Light laffs

Post by Warren » 11 Oct 2018, 17:57

JD wrote:
11 Oct 2018, 16:48
Warren wrote:
11 Oct 2018, 16:21
JD wrote:
11 Oct 2018, 15:33
From a Craigslist posting:
IF ITS POSTED DONT ASK IF ITS AVAILABLE STUPID ASS
Amen, sir, amen.
Because no one has ever left their craigslist post up after they sold their item?
Yeah, I know. It does happen a lot. (Although listings also expire, so...) But it's amusing to see somebody making a point of saying that they do the right thing.
But they're also calling me a stupid ass. My opening inquiry is either "I'm interested in your hookers and blow." or "Are the hookers and blow still available?" I consider those two statements interchangeable. I'm unconvinced that makes me a stupid ass.
*sigh* I'm overthinking this. It's just a light laugh. Sorry.
THIS SPACE FOR RENT

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Ellie
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Joined: 21 Apr 2010, 18:34

Re: Light laffs

Post by Ellie » 11 Oct 2018, 18:13

Yeah, I've seen posts where people say "If this posting is still up the item is still available" and I appreciate that. If you're going to call me a stupid ass in the process, ehhhh, fuck off. :lol:
"NB stands for nota bene do not @ me" - nicole

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JD
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Re: Light laffs

Post by JD » 16 Oct 2018, 14:50

The US Embassy in Canberra, Australia, sent out an invitation to a "cat pyjama-jam", featuring a photo of a tabby cat wearing a blue Cookie Monster outfit. The mission was forced to disappoint everyone, saying it had been a test of an email newsletter platform that wasn't actually supposed to go live.

Image
"Millennials are lazy. They'd rather have avocado toast than cave in a man's skull with a tire iron!" -FFF

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Mo
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Re: Light laffs

Post by Mo » 17 Oct 2018, 08:41

Turn the sound up.

his voice is so soothing, but why do conspiracy nuts always sound like Batman and Robin solving one of Riddler's puzzles out loud? - fod

no one ever yells worldstar when a pet gets fucked up - dhex

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Aresen
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Re: Light laffs

Post by Aresen » 21 Oct 2018, 22:22

OK, it's a redneck joke, but I laughed.
YMBARN if your last words were "hold this".
If Trump supporters wanted a tough guy, why did they elect such a whiny bitch? - Mo

Those who know history are doomed to deja vu. - the innominate one

Never bring a knife to a joke fight" - dhex

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dbcooper
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Re: Light laffs

Post by dbcooper » 22 Oct 2018, 11:22

Slip inside a sleeping bag.

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JD
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Re: Light laffs

Post by JD » 23 Oct 2018, 16:25

Aresen wrote:
21 Oct 2018, 22:22
OK, it's a redneck joke, but I laughed.
YMBARN if your last words were "hold this".
Previously heard as, "What are a redneck's last words? Hold my beer and watch this!" or "...Hey y'all, watch this!"
"Millennials are lazy. They'd rather have avocado toast than cave in a man's skull with a tire iron!" -FFF

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thoreau
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Re: Light laffs

Post by thoreau » 28 Oct 2018, 18:20

Sounds about right.
IMG_20181028_151654.jpeg
IMG_20181028_151654.jpeg (37.52 KiB) Viewed 408 times
"ike Wile E. Coyote salivating over a "4000 Ways To Prepare Roadrunner" cookbook without watching his surroundings, the Road Runner of Societal Inertia snuck up on them both and beepbeeped them off the mesa."
--Shem

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Ellie
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Re: Light laffs

Post by Ellie » 28 Oct 2018, 19:48

I laughed. :)
"NB stands for nota bene do not @ me" - nicole

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Ellie
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Re: Light laffs

Post by Ellie » 28 Oct 2018, 21:40

I'm probably just way overtired, but I can't stop giggling at this.

(from an Ask Reddit thread about awesome things found while dumpster diving)
Another time, found a perfectly good Schwinn world sport circa 1979 bicycle. It had a rusted chain and cracked tires. gears needed adjusting, new seat new cables, fixed it up for $60 in parts. It served me for 5 years I was in college until a heavy friend borrowed it and cracked the frame.
Man, I'm fat. But I sure am glad I'm not "crack the frame of a bike" fat.
"NB stands for nota bene do not @ me" - nicole

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lunchstealer
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Re: Light laffs

Post by lunchstealer » 29 Oct 2018, 02:41

There is no troll but one troll and Dan T. is his prophet.
"The constitution is more of a BDSM agreement with a safe word." - Sandy

"Neoliberalism. Austerity. Booga booga!!!!" - JasonL

"We can't confirm rumors that Lynndie England is in the running to be Gina Haspel's personal aide." - DAR

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JD
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Re: Light laffs

Post by JD » 02 Nov 2018, 10:21

In the 1890s, the German cities of Bonn and Beuel agreed to build a bridge between them over the Rhine. Apparently Beuel backed out of the deal partway through, leaving Bonn to finance the entire thing itself. As a result, the completed bridge included a small statue of a man sticking his butt out at Beuel. Later, when Bonn and Frankfurt were in a dispute about which of them would get to be the new capital, Bonn turned the statue so the butt was facing Frankfurt.
"Millennials are lazy. They'd rather have avocado toast than cave in a man's skull with a tire iron!" -FFF

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lunchstealer
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Re: Light laffs

Post by lunchstealer » 09 Nov 2018, 20:31

The real, undoctored video shows that Acosta didn't just assault her once!

"The constitution is more of a BDSM agreement with a safe word." - Sandy

"Neoliberalism. Austerity. Booga booga!!!!" - JasonL

"We can't confirm rumors that Lynndie England is in the running to be Gina Haspel's personal aide." - DAR

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JD
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Joined: 05 May 2010, 15:26

Re: Light laffs

Post by JD » 15 Nov 2018, 14:08

Best graffiti ever:
46174735_10210429178045793_7436227696788504576_n.jpg
46174735_10210429178045793_7436227696788504576_n.jpg (34.87 KiB) Viewed 243 times
"Millennials are lazy. They'd rather have avocado toast than cave in a man's skull with a tire iron!" -FFF

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dead_elvis
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Re: Light laffs

Post by dead_elvis » 26 Nov 2018, 13:12

"Never forget: a war on undocumented immigrants by necessity is a war on all of our freedoms of association and movement."

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Ellie
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Joined: 21 Apr 2010, 18:34

Re: Light laffs

Post by Ellie » 01 Dec 2018, 17:32

I know I've posted this about a million times before, but I felt like posting it again, SO THERE

"NB stands for nota bene do not @ me" - nicole

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dbcooper
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Re: Light laffs

Post by dbcooper » 04 Dec 2018, 11:37

Slip inside a sleeping bag.

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Highway
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Location: the Electric Ocean

Re: Light laffs

Post by Highway » 04 Dec 2018, 12:07

That's one of those where you jump off into a whole bunch of really highly respected musicians who did something so 80s and Swedish and not really that far out of character. Those guys made 2 whole albums together (and they're not even 1/10th of the released work of ANY of those guys). The 80s are weird...
"Sharks do not go around challenging people to games of chance like dojo breakers."

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