Light laffs

Music, books, movies, TV, games, hobbies, food, and potent potables. And forum games! Pour a drink, put on your smoking jacket, light a pipe (of whatever), and settle in.
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thoreau
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Re: Light laffs

Post by thoreau » 23 Apr 2018, 14:58

If they farmed spiny anteaters then they could get both milk and eggs from the same animal.
"ike Wile E. Coyote salivating over a "4000 Ways To Prepare Roadrunner" cookbook without watching his surroundings, the Road Runner of Societal Inertia snuck up on them both and beepbeeped them off the mesa."
--Shem

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lunchstealer
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Re: Light laffs

Post by lunchstealer » 23 Apr 2018, 14:58

Jasper wrote:
23 Apr 2018, 14:49
"Honey? These eggs are brown, and kinda flat. And smell funny."
The mushrooms growing on them tho...
"The constitution is more of a BDSM agreement with a safe word." - Sandy

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Mo
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Re: Light laffs

Post by Mo » 23 Apr 2018, 17:21

Image

Top is a blog post from the FB VP of ads, bottom is from his twin brother who does PR for a chain of grocery stores.
his voice is so soothing, but why do conspiracy nuts always sound like Batman and Robin solving one of Riddler's puzzles out loud? - fod

no one ever yells worldstar when a pet gets fucked up - dhex

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dhex
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Re: Light laffs

Post by dhex » 23 Apr 2018, 19:46

people are more butthurt over free stuff not being free than i'd anticipated.

this could potentially, ultimately, be positive?
"I do wear my New Balance tennis shoes when I'm wearing cargo shorts, though, because truth in advertising." - lunch

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Kwix
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Re: Light laffs

Post by Kwix » 23 Apr 2018, 20:14

JD wrote:
23 Apr 2018, 12:18
Uh guys that is not where eggs come from

0421181901_HDR_resized.jpg
I first read that as "Cage Free Nutria".
"pedialyte is like planned parenthood for hangovers. it costs you a bit, but it makes your little problem go away until the next time you drink too much."-- dhex
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Eric the .5b
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Re: Light laffs

Post by Eric the .5b » 23 Apr 2018, 20:26

dhex wrote:
23 Apr 2018, 19:46
people are more butthurt over free stuff not being free than i'd anticipated.

this could potentially, ultimately, be positive?
I dunno, maybe if Zuckerberg snapped and said, "Nah, you're not the product. You're the users. But you assholes aren't going to pay to keep Facebook running, or pay to use a search engine, or for anything else online. Oh, sure, you three guys over there would pay a monthly fee. The other billion or so, not so much. So yeah, we give advertisers access to your image macro-soaked eyeballs, which is totally like feeding on your worthless flesh, I get it. And yeah, we gave some political assholes lists of you fucks, but I didn't realize that the same people who post about how they don't care who knows how they love the Confederate flag and triggering the libs would be bothered by people actually knowing that. My bad."

And by the end of the year, Facebook and Google get nationalized.

(I'm actually surprised that I'm not frequently running into people suggesting exactly that.)
"Better that ten guilty persons escape than that one innocent suffer."
"Cyberpunk never really gave the government enough credit for their ability to secure a favorable prenup during the Corporate-State wedding." - Shem

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Warren
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Re: Light laffs

Post by Warren » 23 Apr 2018, 20:31

dhex wrote:
23 Apr 2018, 19:46
people are more butthurt over free stuff not being free than i'd anticipated.

this could potentially, ultimately, be positive?
The YouTubers all butthurt over not getting paid to use the free stuff are the worst.
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dead_elvis
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Re: Light laffs

Post by dead_elvis » 23 Apr 2018, 20:47

Eric the .5b wrote:
23 Apr 2018, 20:26

And by the end of the year, Facebook and Google get nationalized.

(I'm actually surprised that I'm not frequently running into people suggesting exactly that.)
This is regularly suggested on prog boards. Or at least "regulated like a public utility" or something vague like that. Cause yeah, the county water board or every permutation of electric/gas utilities that are so tightly regulated they have to ask permission to fart aren't a total shitshow of corruption and cronyism. Every place I've lived.
"Never forget: a war on undocumented immigrants by necessity is a war on all of our freedoms of association and movement."

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dhex
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Re: Light laffs

Post by dhex » 23 Apr 2018, 21:13

Eric the .5b wrote:
23 Apr 2018, 20:26
dhex wrote:
23 Apr 2018, 19:46
people are more butthurt over free stuff not being free than i'd anticipated.

this could potentially, ultimately, be positive?
I dunno, maybe if Zuckerberg snapped and said, "Nah, you're not the product. You're the users. But you assholes aren't going to pay to keep Facebook running, or pay to use a search engine, or for anything else online. Oh, sure, you three guys over there would pay a monthly fee. The other billion or so, not so much. So yeah, we give advertisers access to your image macro-soaked eyeballs, which is totally like feeding on your worthless flesh, I get it. And yeah, we gave some political assholes lists of you fucks, but I didn't realize that the same people who post about how they don't care who knows how they love the Confederate flag and triggering the libs would be bothered by people actually knowing that. My bad."

And by the end of the year, Facebook and Google get nationalized.

(I'm actually surprised that I'm not frequently running into people suggesting exactly that.)
that'd be a very interesting reality to live in.
"I do wear my New Balance tennis shoes when I'm wearing cargo shorts, though, because truth in advertising." - lunch

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Eric the .5b
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Re: Light laffs

Post by Eric the .5b » 23 Apr 2018, 22:41

dead_elvis wrote:
23 Apr 2018, 20:47
This is regularly suggested on prog boards. Or at least "regulated like a public utility" or something vague like that.
That I've seen, but not open advocacy of nationalization.

Beyond the cronyism and corruption, fuck, I don't want to make it any easier for the government to track us. I'd halfway support banning government agencies from accessing Facebook in their efforts.
"Better that ten guilty persons escape than that one innocent suffer."
"Cyberpunk never really gave the government enough credit for their ability to secure a favorable prenup during the Corporate-State wedding." - Shem

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JasonL
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Re: Light laffs

Post by JasonL » 24 Apr 2018, 08:29

The 5thC guys indicated the whole stinking thing was only info from public profiles. If that’s true this is truly the dumbest scandal of our lives.

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nicole
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Re: Light laffs

Post by nicole » 24 Apr 2018, 08:39

JasonL wrote:
24 Apr 2018, 08:29
The 5thC guys indicated the whole stinking thing was only info from public profiles. If that’s true this is truly the dumbest scandal of our lives.
Which “whole thing”? Because it’s not like they’re under fire for only the Cambridge Analytica stuff at this point.
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nicole
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Re: Light laffs

Post by nicole » 24 Apr 2018, 08:39

dhex wrote:
23 Apr 2018, 19:46
people are more butthurt over free stuff not being free than i'd anticipated.

this could potentially, ultimately, be positive?
lol
"Fucking qualia." -Hugh Akston

"This is why I carry a shoehorn.” -jadagul

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JasonL
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Re: Light laffs

Post by JasonL » 24 Apr 2018, 08:40

nicole wrote:
24 Apr 2018, 08:39
JasonL wrote:
24 Apr 2018, 08:29
The 5thC guys indicated the whole stinking thing was only info from public profiles. If that’s true this is truly the dumbest scandal of our lives.
Which “whole thing”? Because it’s not like they’re under fire for only the Cambridge Analytica stuff at this point.
I meant the CA stuff I guess.

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Mo
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Re: Light laffs

Post by Mo » 24 Apr 2018, 09:18

JasonL wrote:
24 Apr 2018, 08:40
nicole wrote:
24 Apr 2018, 08:39
JasonL wrote:
24 Apr 2018, 08:29
The 5thC guys indicated the whole stinking thing was only info from public profiles. If that’s true this is truly the dumbest scandal of our lives.
Which “whole thing”? Because it’s not like they’re under fire for only the Cambridge Analytica stuff at this point.
I meant the CA stuff I guess.
You used to be able to pull a lot of info from people's friends (non-public and public) on FB pre-2014ish (I think that was the year).
his voice is so soothing, but why do conspiracy nuts always sound like Batman and Robin solving one of Riddler's puzzles out loud? - fod

no one ever yells worldstar when a pet gets fucked up - dhex

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dhex
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Re: Light laffs

Post by dhex » 24 Apr 2018, 09:37

nicole wrote:
24 Apr 2018, 08:39
dhex wrote:
23 Apr 2018, 19:46
people are more butthurt over free stuff not being free than i'd anticipated.

this could potentially, ultimately, be positive?
lol
Hey now I used a lot of commas and a question mark in that sentence.
"I do wear my New Balance tennis shoes when I'm wearing cargo shorts, though, because truth in advertising." - lunch

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Kolohe
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Re: Light laffs

Post by Kolohe » 27 Apr 2018, 08:35

DUFFEL BLOG PRESENTS: Ayn Rand gives your weekend safety brief
I do not know why you all look to me to give you direction for your weekend activities, much less your lives. Had I the choice, I would remove the shackles the lieutenant has placed upon me concerning your lives, and indeed, those of him upon me.

Sir, are these men and women not motivated to keep safe by their own interest? What strength have my cautions against their own instinct of self-preservation? Further, how might you defend your insistence to the troops in avoiding the excess of alcohol, while your Facebook account shows you naked and drunk during your stay at the Academy?

Alas, the detestable authority over me forces my hand.
when you wake up as the queen of the n=1 kingdom and mount your steed non sequiturius, do you look out upon all you survey and think “damn, it feels good to be a green idea sleeping furiously?" - dhex

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Warren
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Re: Light laffs

Post by Warren » 27 Apr 2018, 15:51

Nothing's ever going to top The Invisible King.
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dead_elvis
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Re: Light laffs

Post by dead_elvis » 27 Apr 2018, 16:44

Warren wrote:
27 Apr 2018, 15:51
Nothing's ever going to top The Invisible King.
orson_wells_Slow-Clap.gif
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"Never forget: a war on undocumented immigrants by necessity is a war on all of our freedoms of association and movement."

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Eric the .5b
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Re: Light laffs

Post by Eric the .5b » 27 Apr 2018, 17:18

"The Invisible King" is great, but that bit is funny, too.
"Better that ten guilty persons escape than that one innocent suffer."
"Cyberpunk never really gave the government enough credit for their ability to secure a favorable prenup during the Corporate-State wedding." - Shem

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tr0g
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Re: Light laffs

Post by tr0g » 27 Apr 2018, 18:33

Warren wrote:
27 Apr 2018, 15:51
Nothing's ever going to top The Invisible King.
Good to see Frank hasn't drank himself to death yet. I knew him in college. He is a unique individual.
Yeah but how can you tell at a glance which junk a raccoon is packing? Also, gay raccoons? - Hugh Akston
Nothing you can say is as important as the existence of a functioning marketplace of ideas, go set yourself on fire. - JasonL

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Warren
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Re: Light laffs

Post by Warren » 27 Apr 2018, 19:28

tr0g wrote:
27 Apr 2018, 18:33
Warren wrote:
27 Apr 2018, 15:51
Nothing's ever going to top The Invisible King.
Good to see Frank hasn't drank himself to death yet. I knew him in college. He is a unique individual.
He may have. That piece is several years old.
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Painboy
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Re: Light laffs

Post by Painboy » 28 Apr 2018, 13:10

31306749.jpg
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Ellie
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Re: Light laffs

Post by Ellie » 28 Apr 2018, 14:05

The last comment made me actually laugh out loud.
I should have listened to Warren. He was right again as usual.

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lunchstealer
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Re: Light laffs

Post by lunchstealer » 28 Apr 2018, 16:43

I realize I'm not without sin and don't want to cast the first stone but...

"pugs are lube"?
"The constitution is more of a BDSM agreement with a safe word." - Sandy

"Neoliberalism. Austerity. Booga booga!!!!" - JasonL

"We can't confirm rumors that Lynndie England is in the running to be Gina Haspel's personal aide." - DAR

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