News that could have been in the Onion

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Ellie
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Ellie » 11 Mar 2019, 17:35

Having worn a few neckties while trying (probably futilely) to earn some butch cred, all I can say is that I don't know how you guys walk around with those things.
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dhex
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by dhex » 11 Mar 2019, 17:56

It's not difficult.
"i ran over the cat and didnt stop just carried on with tears in my eyes joose driving my way to work." - God

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Kwix
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Kwix » 11 Mar 2019, 18:26

Ellie wrote:
11 Mar 2019, 17:35
Having worn a few neckties while trying (probably futilely) to earn some butch cred, all I can say is that I don't know how you guys walk around with those things.
Well, tying it at an appropriate length so it doesn't trip you is step 1.
"People are sometimes the answer, but they are ALWAYS the problem." -- Ellie
"pedialyte is like planned parenthood for hangovers. it costs you a bit, but it makes your little problem go away until the next time you drink too much."-- dhex

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Mo
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Mo » 11 Mar 2019, 18:45

Hugh Akston wrote:One of the nice things about living in Los Angeles is that there is almost never an appropriate occasion to wear a necktie. Basically only if you're an attorney going to court.
It’s 2019, even in NYC and London the appropriate occasions are some job interviews, far too formal work events, like industry awards shows (please kill me), weddings (tie optional) or a function involving leadership of a foreign state. That or being on trial.
his voice is so soothing, but why do conspiracy nuts always sound like Batman and Robin solving one of Riddler's puzzles out loud? - fod

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Mo
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Mo » 11 Mar 2019, 18:46

Ellie wrote:Having worn a few neckties while trying (probably futilely) to earn some butch cred, all I can say is that I don't know how you guys walk around with those things.
Bow tie is the hard one. Just remember, it’s like tying your shoe from inside your shoe.
his voice is so soothing, but why do conspiracy nuts always sound like Batman and Robin solving one of Riddler's puzzles out loud? - fod

no one ever yells worldstar when a pet gets fucked up - dhex

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Jadagul
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Jadagul » 11 Mar 2019, 18:47

Mo wrote:
11 Mar 2019, 18:45
Hugh Akston wrote:One of the nice things about living in Los Angeles is that there is almost never an appropriate occasion to wear a necktie. Basically only if you're an attorney going to court.
It’s 2019, even in NYC and London the appropriate occasions are some job interviews, far too formal work events, like industry awards shows (please kill me), weddings (tie optional) or a function involving leadership of a foreign state. That or being on trial.
Or just any time you want to look awesome.

Every time I wear a tie I get random unsolicited compliments. Also often women coming over to straighten it periodically.

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Aresen
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Aresen » 11 Mar 2019, 19:47

Jadagul wrote:
11 Mar 2019, 18:47
Mo wrote:
11 Mar 2019, 18:45
Hugh Akston wrote:One of the nice things about living in Los Angeles is that there is almost never an appropriate occasion to wear a necktie. Basically only if you're an attorney going to court.
It’s 2019, even in NYC and London the appropriate occasions are some job interviews, far too formal work events, like industry awards shows (please kill me), weddings (tie optional) or a function involving leadership of a foreign state. That or being on trial.
Or just any time you want to look awesome.

Every time I wear a tie I get random unsolicited compliments. Also often women coming over to straighten it periodically.
It's not that we want to kill you Jadagul. It's just that we're petty, envious trolls.
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Warren
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Warren » 11 Mar 2019, 20:38

Kwix wrote:
11 Mar 2019, 18:26
Ellie wrote:
11 Mar 2019, 17:35
Having worn a few neckties while trying (probably futilely) to earn some butch cred, all I can say is that I don't know how you guys walk around with those things.
Well, tying it at an appropriate length so it doesn't trip you is step 1.
I'm guessing that's another lame dig on the POTUS

Step 1 is getting a shirt with the right size collar.
It's dumb out there kids, keep your heads down. - JasonL

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Andrew
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Andrew » 11 Mar 2019, 22:40

Aresen wrote:
11 Mar 2019, 19:47
Jadagul wrote:
11 Mar 2019, 18:47
Mo wrote:
11 Mar 2019, 18:45
Hugh Akston wrote:One of the nice things about living in Los Angeles is that there is almost never an appropriate occasion to wear a necktie. Basically only if you're an attorney going to court.
It’s 2019, even in NYC and London the appropriate occasions are some job interviews, far too formal work events, like industry awards shows (please kill me), weddings (tie optional) or a function involving leadership of a foreign state. That or being on trial.
Or just any time you want to look awesome.

Every time I wear a tie I get random unsolicited compliments. Also often women coming over to straighten it periodically.
It's not that we want to kill you Jadagul. It's just that we're petty, envious trolls.
I'm a petty, envious ogre, thank you very much.
We live in the fucked age. Get used to it. - dhex

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lunchstealer
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by lunchstealer » 12 Mar 2019, 05:19

Warren wrote:
Kwix wrote:
11 Mar 2019, 18:26
Ellie wrote:
11 Mar 2019, 17:35
Having worn a few neckties while trying (probably futilely) to earn some butch cred, all I can say is that I don't know how you guys walk around with those things.
Well, tying it at an appropriate length so it doesn't trip you is step 1.
I'm guessing that's another lame dig on the POTUS

Step 1 is getting a shirt with the right size collar.
Your trump derangement syndrome is leaking again. Ellie says ‘I don’t know how you guys walk around in those things,’ so Kwix says ‘don’t tie it so long that you trip over it,’ not because Trump is a goddamned idiot who doesn’t understand ties, but because having a tie you could trip over would make it hard to walk around in a tie as Ellie worried about.

You’re just so sensitive to anything that might be an insult to the dear leader. You should loosen up.
"The constitution is more of a BDSM agreement with a safe word." - Sandy

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JasonL
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by JasonL » 12 Mar 2019, 08:49

Its super rare around here now too.

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Warren
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Warren » 12 Mar 2019, 11:47

lunchstealer wrote:
12 Mar 2019, 05:19
Warren wrote:
Kwix wrote:
11 Mar 2019, 18:26
Ellie wrote:
11 Mar 2019, 17:35
Having worn a few neckties while trying (probably futilely) to earn some butch cred, all I can say is that I don't know how you guys walk around with those things.
Well, tying it at an appropriate length so it doesn't trip you is step 1.
I'm guessing that's another lame dig on the POTUS

Step 1 is getting a shirt with the right size collar.
Your trump derangement syndrome is leaking again. Ellie says ‘I don’t know how you guys walk around in those things,’ so Kwix says ‘don’t tie it so long that you trip over it,’ not because Trump is a goddamned idiot who doesn’t understand ties, but because having a tie you could trip over would make it hard to walk around in a tie as Ellie worried about.

You’re just so sensitive to anything that might be an insult to the dear leader. You should loosen up.
Yeah, no. I'm simply not sensitive in that way. Like at all.

I just couldn't think of why Kwix would say that. If you're over 4' tall, you can't even tie a necktie long enough to trip over. The only way I could make the joke work is if it was directed at Trump who is an idiot that wears his ties past his belt.
It's dumb out there kids, keep your heads down. - JasonL

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D.A. Ridgely
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by D.A. Ridgely » 12 Mar 2019, 12:29

Neckties come in standard and long lengths, the latter being necessary for tall or fat men unless they want to look like Oliver Hardy. Learning to tie both long and bow ties isn't that difficult, it's just that most men don't want to be bothered to make the modest investment in time and trouble it takes to learn. If they're really all that uncomfortable when you're wearing one, chances are your shirt neck size is the actual problem.

Jadagul, you don't need to wear a tie to "get it straightened"; just go to an "Asian Day Spa."

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Dangerman
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Dangerman » 12 Mar 2019, 13:04

Yo, it's not hard to walk away from a fight but it's the stakes, not the odds. I've never been in a legit fight as an adult, doesn't mean that it can't happen. I believe I did say I thought it was silly.

I see daytime business ties around here, but it's a lot of banks and insurance companies and I think they're compensating a little for living in the woods with woods folk. They 100% are not stylish ties. Which isn't saying much coming from me, probably, but whatever.

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lunchstealer
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by lunchstealer » 12 Mar 2019, 13:32

Warren wrote:
12 Mar 2019, 11:47
lunchstealer wrote:
12 Mar 2019, 05:19
Warren wrote:
Kwix wrote:
11 Mar 2019, 18:26
Ellie wrote:
11 Mar 2019, 17:35
Having worn a few neckties while trying (probably futilely) to earn some butch cred, all I can say is that I don't know how you guys walk around with those things.
Well, tying it at an appropriate length so it doesn't trip you is step 1.
I'm guessing that's another lame dig on the POTUS

Step 1 is getting a shirt with the right size collar.
Your trump derangement syndrome is leaking again. Ellie says ‘I don’t know how you guys walk around in those things,’ so Kwix says ‘don’t tie it so long that you trip over it,’ not because Trump is a goddamned idiot who doesn’t understand ties, but because having a tie you could trip over would make it hard to walk around in a tie as Ellie worried about.

You’re just so sensitive to anything that might be an insult to the dear leader. You should loosen up.
Yeah, no. I'm simply not sensitive in that way. Like at all.

I just couldn't think of why Kwix would say that. If you're over 4' tall, you can't even tie a necktie long enough to trip over. The only way I could make the joke work is if it was directed at Trump who is an idiot that wears his ties past his belt.
Is joke because Ellie said 'how u guys walk with tie' meaning 'how can you guys tolerate it' but kwix make joke taking Ellie literally by saying, 'haha tie tie rite so no trip over.' is absurd, and absurd funny. Is funny precisely because no can tie tie so long you trip. Is no trump.
"The constitution is more of a BDSM agreement with a safe word." - Sandy

"Neoliberalism. Austerity. Booga booga!!!!" - JasonL

"We can't confirm rumors that Lynndie England is in the running to be Gina Haspel's personal aide." - DAR

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Warren
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Warren » 12 Mar 2019, 13:33

OIC

Thanks for explaining it for me ;)
It's dumb out there kids, keep your heads down. - JasonL

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Mo
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Mo » 12 Mar 2019, 13:41

Warren wrote:
12 Mar 2019, 11:47
Yeah, no. I'm simply not sensitive in that way. Like at all.
Dood, you white knight for him way more than someone who is not sensitive about it would/should.
his voice is so soothing, but why do conspiracy nuts always sound like Batman and Robin solving one of Riddler's puzzles out loud? - fod

no one ever yells worldstar when a pet gets fucked up - dhex

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Kwix
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Kwix » 12 Mar 2019, 15:27

Warren wrote:
12 Mar 2019, 13:33
OIC

Thanks for explaining it for me ;)
Just for confirmation it was a joke about long ties and short people. It had nothing to do with the Tangerine in Chief. I figure that in his life he's learned to do at least one thing right and that's wear a suit with tie.
"People are sometimes the answer, but they are ALWAYS the problem." -- Ellie
"pedialyte is like planned parenthood for hangovers. it costs you a bit, but it makes your little problem go away until the next time you drink too much."-- dhex

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Warren
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Warren » 12 Mar 2019, 15:41

Mo wrote:
12 Mar 2019, 13:41
Warren wrote:
12 Mar 2019, 11:47
Yeah, no. I'm simply not sensitive in that way. Like at all.
Dood, you white knight for him way more than someone who is not sensitive about it would/should.
No, I really don't. That you think I do is the problem.
It's dumb out there kids, keep your heads down. - JasonL

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dhex
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by dhex » 12 Mar 2019, 16:17

team not warren.
"i ran over the cat and didnt stop just carried on with tears in my eyes joose driving my way to work." - God

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Jasper
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Jasper » 13 Mar 2019, 13:39

On the topic of Warren and Trump, would the phrase "Warren totes stans Trump" be the correct structure? Trying to learn here.
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lunchstealer
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by lunchstealer » 13 Mar 2019, 17:25

Jasper wrote:
13 Mar 2019, 13:39
On the topic of Warren and Trump, would the phrase "Warren totes stans Trump" be the correct structure? Trying to learn here.
Naw, mostly just he's overcompensating for perceived TDS and his defences against TDS end up being over the top a lot of the time.
"The constitution is more of a BDSM agreement with a safe word." - Sandy

"Neoliberalism. Austerity. Booga booga!!!!" - JasonL

"We can't confirm rumors that Lynndie England is in the running to be Gina Haspel's personal aide." - DAR

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D.A. Ridgely
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by D.A. Ridgely » 13 Mar 2019, 17:37

lunchstealer wrote:
13 Mar 2019, 17:25
Jasper wrote:
13 Mar 2019, 13:39
On the topic of Warren and Trump, would the phrase "Warren totes stans Trump" be the correct structure? Trying to learn here.
Naw, mostly just he's overcompensating for perceived TDS and his defences against TDS end up being a comb-over the top a lot of the time.
Better.

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Warren
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Warren » 16 Mar 2019, 11:28

lunchstealer wrote:
13 Mar 2019, 17:25
Jasper wrote:
13 Mar 2019, 13:39
On the topic of Warren and Trump, would the phrase "Warren totes stans Trump" be the correct structure? Trying to learn here.
Naw, mostly just he's overcompensating for perceived TDS and his defences against TDS end up being over the top a lot of the time.
You might not be completely wrong there.
It's dumb out there kids, keep your heads down. - JasonL

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Warren
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Warren » 21 Jul 2019, 09:55

It's dumb out there kids, keep your heads down. - JasonL

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