News that could have been in the Onion

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Eric the .5b
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Eric the .5b »

Change.org still exists. People are still submitting petitions to it.

It's like when they announced YTMND was shutting down.
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D.A. Ridgely
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

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D.A. Ridgely
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

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Ellie
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

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"Yours is the much better comeback." -JD

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Eric the .5b
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Eric the .5b »

"Better that ten guilty persons escape than that one innocent suffer."
Cet animal est très méchant / Quand on l'attaque il se défend.

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Aresen
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Aresen »

I thought that was legal tender in Missouri.
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Warren
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Warren »

Aresen wrote:
21 Dec 2019, 10:35
I thought that was legal tender in Missouri.
Arby's? No. Lion's Choice.
I might be just two degrees of separation removed from the good Reverend. Mary is a graduate of Truman State. But I'm not asking her if she knew him.
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Jake
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Jake »

I think "the desire to engage in sexual activity with the sort of person who'd engage in sexual activity in exchange for an Arby's gift card" is a particularly niche fetish.

And a disturbing one.
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Warren
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Warren »

Jake wrote:
21 Dec 2019, 17:46
And a disturbing one.
How so?
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Jake
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Jake »

Warren wrote:
21 Dec 2019, 20:30
Jake wrote:
21 Dec 2019, 17:46
And a disturbing one.
How so?
I'm all for the right to do whatever sick, twisted sexual stuff you want to with any other consenting adult. But Arby's? That's just a cry for help.
"Facebook is like a locker room with all the players screaming at each other how much they have to win and then forgetting they have to take the field and actually play the gawddamn game." -- D.A. Ridgely

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JD
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by JD »

A group of 'furries' stopped a domestic violence assault and helped police make the arrest

Complete with picture of fursuiters piling on the arrestee. (BTW, kudos to CNN for going with the straight-up headline and not some cutesy clickbait garbage)
I sort of feel like a sucker about aspiring to be intellectually rigorous when I could just go on twitter and say capitalism causes space herpes and no one will challenge me on it. - Hugh Akston

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thoreau
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

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Kolohe
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Kolohe »



Libertarian calls the fire department.
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Warren
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Warren »

Kolohe wrote:
18 Feb 2020, 22:00


Libertarian calls the fire department.
Who's fucked now Julian?
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Mo
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Mo »

GOP eyeing tax cuts to counter the coronavirus.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/business ... -tax-cuts/
his voice is so soothing, but why do conspiracy nuts always sound like Batman and Robin solving one of Riddler's puzzles out loud? - fod

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Warren
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Warren »

Mo wrote:
28 Feb 2020, 20:08
GOP eyeing tax cuts to counter the coronavirus.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/business ... -tax-cuts/
I don't understand why even have taxes anymore. Why doesn't the government just borrow what it spends?
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Aresen
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Aresen »

Warren wrote:
29 Feb 2020, 10:36
Mo wrote:
28 Feb 2020, 20:08
GOP eyeing tax cuts to counter the coronavirus.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/business ... -tax-cuts/
I don't understand why even have taxes anymore. Why doesn't the government just borrow print what it spends?
FIFY.
If Trump supporters wanted a tough guy, why did they elect such a whiny bitch? - Mo

Those who know history are doomed to deja vu. - the innominate one

Never bring a knife to a joke fight" - dhex

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Warren
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Warren »

Aresen wrote:
29 Feb 2020, 10:38
Warren wrote:
29 Feb 2020, 10:36
Mo wrote:
28 Feb 2020, 20:08
GOP eyeing tax cuts to counter the coronavirus.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/business ... -tax-cuts/
I don't understand why even have taxes anymore. Why doesn't the government just borrow print what it spends?
FIFY.
Better still.

I'm actually not kidding. I think if the government just printed the money it spends, then taxes would be paid by everyone holding USD in the form of inflation. You couldn't avoid the tax so long as you traded in USD and there would be no need for IRS or enforcement.
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JD
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by JD »

Warren wrote:
29 Feb 2020, 10:36
Mo wrote:
28 Feb 2020, 20:08
GOP eyeing tax cuts to counter the coronavirus.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/business ... -tax-cuts/
I don't understand why even have taxes anymore. Why doesn't the government just borrow what it spends?
Because then the government couldn't use taxes as an instrument of social policy.
I sort of feel like a sucker about aspiring to be intellectually rigorous when I could just go on twitter and say capitalism causes space herpes and no one will challenge me on it. - Hugh Akston

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D.A. Ridgely
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by D.A. Ridgely »

JD wrote:
29 Feb 2020, 13:45
Warren wrote:
29 Feb 2020, 10:36
Mo wrote:
28 Feb 2020, 20:08
GOP eyeing tax cuts to counter the coronavirus.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/business ... -tax-cuts/
I don't understand why even have taxes anymore. Why doesn't the government just borrow what it spends?
Because then the government politicians couldn't use taxes as an instrument of social policy to reward supporters and punish opponents...
... in other words.

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Mo
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Mo »

Warren wrote:
29 Feb 2020, 10:45
Aresen wrote:
29 Feb 2020, 10:38
Warren wrote:
29 Feb 2020, 10:36
Mo wrote:
28 Feb 2020, 20:08
GOP eyeing tax cuts to counter the coronavirus.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/business ... -tax-cuts/
I don't understand why even have taxes anymore. Why doesn't the government just borrow print what it spends?
FIFY.
Better still.

I'm actually not kidding. I think if the government just printed the money it spends, then taxes would be paid by everyone holding USD in the form of inflation. You couldn't avoid the tax so long as you traded in USD and there would be no need for IRS or enforcement.
That’s basically MMT.
his voice is so soothing, but why do conspiracy nuts always sound like Batman and Robin solving one of Riddler's puzzles out loud? - fod

no one ever yells worldstar when a pet gets fucked up - dhex

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Warren
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Warren »

Mo wrote:
29 Feb 2020, 14:29
Warren wrote:
29 Feb 2020, 10:45
Aresen wrote:
29 Feb 2020, 10:38
Warren wrote:
29 Feb 2020, 10:36
Mo wrote:
28 Feb 2020, 20:08
GOP eyeing tax cuts to counter the coronavirus.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/business ... -tax-cuts/
I don't understand why even have taxes anymore. Why doesn't the government just borrow print what it spends?
FIFY.
Better still.

I'm actually not kidding. I think if the government just printed the money it spends, then taxes would be paid by everyone holding USD in the form of inflation. You couldn't avoid the tax so long as you traded in USD and there would be no need for IRS or enforcement.
That’s basically MMT.
:shock:
Oh god, you're right.
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Mo
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Mo »

Of course I’m right. ;)
his voice is so soothing, but why do conspiracy nuts always sound like Batman and Robin solving one of Riddler's puzzles out loud? - fod

no one ever yells worldstar when a pet gets fucked up - dhex

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JD
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by JD »

I once would have felt this headline was generated by Mad Libs, but it seems as realistic as anything else these days.
Public Enemy Fire Flavor Flav After Bernie Sanders Rally Spat
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Aresen
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Re: News that could have been in the Onion

Post by Aresen »

JD wrote:
02 Mar 2020, 09:59
I once would have felt this headline was generated by Mad Libs, but it seems as realistic as anything else these days.
Public Enemy Fire Flavor Flav After Bernie Sanders Rally Spat
That really sounds like a NY Post headline.
If Trump supporters wanted a tough guy, why did they elect such a whiny bitch? - Mo

Those who know history are doomed to deja vu. - the innominate one

Never bring a knife to a joke fight" - dhex

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