Groping Resistance - Pfft.

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Jadagul
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by Jadagul » 06 Jul 2014, 22:39

Timothy wrote:The scientific advisory committee keeps trying to get the FAA to nix that "keep shit off until X time" nonsense, but much like the FDA and birth control, science has no place in policy.

Also, when will our allies stop letting us dictate to them what they have to do in their airports? Why the fuck should we get to tell Belgium how to run airport security?
One nice thing about having one of new tablet hybrid computers is that it counts as a hybrid and I can use it for the entire goddamn flight.

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D.A. Ridgely
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by D.A. Ridgely » 06 Jul 2014, 22:52

Jadagul wrote:
Timothy wrote:The scientific advisory committee keeps trying to get the FAA to nix that "keep shit off until X time" nonsense, but much like the FDA and birth control, science has no place in policy.

Also, when will our allies stop letting us dictate to them what they have to do in their airports? Why the fuck should we get to tell Belgium how to run airport security?
One nice thing about having one of new tablet hybrid computers is that it counts as a hybrid and I can use it for the entire goddamn flight.
So it runs on both electricity and gasoline?

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thoreau
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by thoreau » 06 Jul 2014, 22:56

Last time I flew I ignored the rule on laptop use. We were running so late that half the passengers were in a mood to lynch the nearest available airline employee, so the flight attendants knew better than to try to enforce rules. I kept typing as we landed.
"ike Wile E. Coyote salivating over a "4000 Ways To Prepare Roadrunner" cookbook without watching his surroundings, the Road Runner of Societal Inertia snuck up on them both and beepbeeped them off the mesa."
--Shem

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nicole
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by nicole » 07 Jul 2014, 09:48

Jennifer wrote:Every once in awhile, I'll think "Maybe I should lighten up and fly again; I know Jeff would be happier if we could fly on vacations and stuff," and then I read anecdotes such as the most recent ones here and I realize I could never do it. I would have been arrested, or at least punished via being forced to miss my flight -- not even for assault or threats or anything that might remotely count as badassery, not even for "obscene" language, most likely just for lese majeste -- I could possibly put up with some useless dumbass fondling my armpits, but I could not go along with the polite fiction that this is anything other than a worthless dumbass fondling my armpits. At the very least, I'm sure I'd have been angry enough to ask if he/she really expected to find anything dangerous in there, or just enjoys the clammy feel of strangers' armpits in the summer.

(Note to self: if I do fly under TSA regimes, especially in hot humid weather, do not use antiperspirant. Two people will be involved in any TSA encounter; damned if I'll be the only one revolted by it.)
I know you're super against flying under TSA rules, and I don't entirely blame you, but I continue to recommend the full-body patdown as an alternative. Everyone's unhappy, and you can make a spectacle of yourself reminding people what the new machines are really doing. I'm at my proudest to be an American when an agent of the state is forced to feel all the way under my skirt in public.
"Fucking qualia." -Hugh Akston

"This is why I carry a shoehorn.” -jadagul

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Mo
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by Mo » 07 Jul 2014, 09:52

Now you're going to get Warren to become a female TSA agent in Chicago in some sort of Mrs. Doubtfire-esque situation.
his voice is so soothing, but why do conspiracy nuts always sound like Batman and Robin solving one of Riddler's puzzles out loud? - fod

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nicole
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by nicole » 07 Jul 2014, 10:14

He can pick ORD or LGA; I'll be getting molested at both regularly for the foreseeable future.
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"This is why I carry a shoehorn.” -jadagul

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Warren
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by Warren » 07 Jul 2014, 11:43

Sink the sub. Hide the weasel. Park the porpoise. A bit of the old Humpty Dumpty, Little Jack Horny, the Horizontal Mambo, hmm? The Bone Dancer, Rumpleforeskin, Baloney Bop, a bit of the old Cunning Linguistics?
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Rachel
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by Rachel » 07 Jul 2014, 11:50

nicole wrote:
Jennifer wrote:Every once in awhile, I'll think "Maybe I should lighten up and fly again; I know Jeff would be happier if we could fly on vacations and stuff," and then I read anecdotes such as the most recent ones here and I realize I could never do it. I would have been arrested, or at least punished via being forced to miss my flight -- not even for assault or threats or anything that might remotely count as badassery, not even for "obscene" language, most likely just for lese majeste -- I could possibly put up with some useless dumbass fondling my armpits, but I could not go along with the polite fiction that this is anything other than a worthless dumbass fondling my armpits. At the very least, I'm sure I'd have been angry enough to ask if he/she really expected to find anything dangerous in there, or just enjoys the clammy feel of strangers' armpits in the summer.

(Note to self: if I do fly under TSA regimes, especially in hot humid weather, do not use antiperspirant. Two people will be involved in any TSA encounter; damned if I'll be the only one revolted by it.)
I know you're super against flying under TSA rules, and I don't entirely blame you, but I continue to recommend the full-body patdown as an alternative. Everyone's unhappy, and you can make a spectacle of yourself reminding people what the new machines are really doing. I'm at my proudest to be an American when an agent of the state is forced to feel all the way under my skirt in public.
Heh, I'd do this same thing, except that it takes too long and I'm really impatient. Plus, I don't like other women touching me (seriously, I won't see a female doctor because it just makes me uncomfortable) and I know an opposite sex TSA agent would be out of the question, so I'll just go with the naked X-Ray machine.
No lie I'm fucking tired of glorified false histories-JasonL

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nicole
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by nicole » 07 Jul 2014, 12:02

It's one of those times where it's extra effective to be a little white girl, too. OH NOEZ LOOK HOW DANGEROUS SHE IS.
"Fucking qualia." -Hugh Akston

"This is why I carry a shoehorn.” -jadagul

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Rachel
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by Rachel » 07 Jul 2014, 12:14

Hehe. I'm 5'2 and my "bitchy resting face" can also easily look like a "sad, genuinely slightly confused good girl." Especially if I bite my lip and try to look worried.
No lie I'm fucking tired of glorified false histories-JasonL

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Rachel
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by Rachel » 07 Jul 2014, 12:14

Hehe. I'm 5'2 and my "bitchy resting face" can also easily look like a "sad, genuinely slightly confused good girl." Especially if I bite my lip and try to look worried.
No lie I'm fucking tired of glorified false histories-JasonL

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nicole
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by nicole » 07 Jul 2014, 12:22

Twinsies!
"Fucking qualia." -Hugh Akston

"This is why I carry a shoehorn.” -jadagul

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Rachel
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by Rachel » 07 Jul 2014, 12:26

One of these days, when you come to New York, we'll have to get together and run a muck.
No lie I'm fucking tired of glorified false histories-JasonL

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Jennifer
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by Jennifer » 07 Jul 2014, 12:26

I wouldn't be able to do it because for me, the issue is threefold: being groped 1) against my will, 2) unnecessarily, and 3) for dishonest reasons. Ironically enough, I'd be less annoyed by the TSA gropefests if they came right out and admitted "This won't do jack to stop another 9/11 but we're doing something so we can say we're Doing Something, and also providing a government makework program for skill-free people who are incapable of existing without government handouts anyway, so let's let the stupid little dears think they're actually earning their way through life." (On the thread about the Detroit water shutdowns, I was not remotely surprised to discover that the water-shutdown poster child, the welfare mother of three who appears in all the sob stories, is also attending college at taxpayer expense to get a degree in "homeland security." Yes, of course she is.)

But don't fucking tell me that you're making me submit to a freedom fingerbang for my benefit, or to defend against terrorism or make the world a safer place or any dishonest gaslighting bullshit like that. If I want to associate with a stupid trashy dishonest sociopath who abuses people and then insists such abuse is actually for their own benefit, I'll un-estrange myself from my mother: at least she's rich, and in exchange for being treated like criminal scum and expected to be grateful for it, I'd get money and valuable presents.
"Myself, despite what they say about libertarians, I think we're actually allowed to pursue options beyond futility or sucking the dicks of the powerful." -- Eric the .5b

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Mo
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by Mo » 07 Jul 2014, 12:28

nicole wrote:It's one of those times where it's extra effective to be a little white girl, too. OH NOEZ LOOK HOW DANGEROUS SHE IS.
Yeah, I always opt out and it probably only makes people feel better about it, "Look, it's the sketchy bearded Arab guy getting felt up." Maybe it will be better when I travel with Mojito.
his voice is so soothing, but why do conspiracy nuts always sound like Batman and Robin solving one of Riddler's puzzles out loud? - fod

no one ever yells worldstar when a pet gets fucked up - dhex

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Timothy
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by Timothy » 07 Jul 2014, 12:29

I don't opt for the patdown because I hate being touched by strangers. If I have to have my rights violated, I would honestly rather somebody get a blurry nude than feel me up. Aside from which, the NIR scanners that are still present are safer than the actual plane ride. I mean, NIR is lower energy than visible light. I don't fly much (1-2x a year) and I think that the TSA should probably just change its name to Minipeace and be done with it, but I'm still taking getting looked at vs getting groped.
"i say make some popcorn and give me a blanket to hide this six foot boner i have." --dhex

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Rachel
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by Rachel » 07 Jul 2014, 12:35

Mo wrote:
nicole wrote:It's one of those times where it's extra effective to be a little white girl, too. OH NOEZ LOOK HOW DANGEROUS SHE IS.
Yeah, I always opt out and it probably only makes people feel better about it, "Look, it's the sketchy bearded Arab guy getting felt up." Maybe it will be better when I travel with Mojito.
I think if you and Mrs. Mo travel with Mojito one of you will have to opt for the pat down anyway? (IIRC you can't go through the X-Ray machine holding a baby) But then Mojito will seem suspicious? TERRORIST BABY!!!
No lie I'm fucking tired of glorified false histories-JasonL

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Mo
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by Mo » 07 Jul 2014, 13:17

Note to self: Buy one of these by October.

Image
his voice is so soothing, but why do conspiracy nuts always sound like Batman and Robin solving one of Riddler's puzzles out loud? - fod

no one ever yells worldstar when a pet gets fucked up - dhex

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Jennifer
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by Jennifer » 07 Jul 2014, 13:19

Wouldn't an American flag onesie be a better idea?
"Myself, despite what they say about libertarians, I think we're actually allowed to pursue options beyond futility or sucking the dicks of the powerful." -- Eric the .5b

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Mo
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by Mo » 07 Jul 2014, 13:24

Go big or go home
his voice is so soothing, but why do conspiracy nuts always sound like Batman and Robin solving one of Riddler's puzzles out loud? - fod

no one ever yells worldstar when a pet gets fucked up - dhex

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Rachel
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by Rachel » 07 Jul 2014, 13:32

Since Mojito is being raised a Catholic would it be really offensive to dress him in a tiny Pope costume?
No lie I'm fucking tired of glorified false histories-JasonL

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nicole
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by nicole » 07 Jul 2014, 13:55

Timothy wrote:I don't opt for the patdown because I hate being touched by strangers. If I have to have my rights violated, I would honestly rather somebody get a blurry nude than feel me up. Aside from which, the NIR scanners that are still present are safer than the actual plane ride. I mean, NIR is lower energy than visible light. I don't fly much (1-2x a year) and I think that the TSA should probably just change its name to Minipeace and be done with it, but I'm still taking getting looked at vs getting groped.
It's funny how people feel really differently about this. I've known a lot of people who had a much more visceral reaction to being touched, whereas I have that to going through the machine. The one time I went through it was because I was too close to my flight time to risk waiting for the opt-out, and standing there in position with my arms over my head, I was sobbing before I was out of the thing. Soooooo much more visceral for me to stand there, with my hands up, alone, in a little fishbowl. Doesn't bother me at all, however, to be touched (I mean, aside from the fact it bothers me tremendously that any of this happens at all), and that way makes mostly everyone but me uncomfortable.

When I go through with L-dub we have a nicely refined co-picture-taking method as well, especially since a couple years ago they pulled me into a private room for special extra screening and he almost flipped his shit at JFK asking whether I was under arrest and he should call our lawyer, over and over for about half an hour. Now that was a fun time. (Protip for pat-downees: always make sure your screener takes new gloves out of the box and puts them on in front of you. Always.)
"Fucking qualia." -Hugh Akston

"This is why I carry a shoehorn.” -jadagul

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GinSlinger
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by GinSlinger » 07 Jul 2014, 13:56

I'm actually looking forward to being groped tomorrow, a little at least.

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Timothy
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by Timothy » 07 Jul 2014, 15:35

nicole wrote:
Timothy wrote:I don't opt for the patdown because I hate being touched by strangers. If I have to have my rights violated, I would honestly rather somebody get a blurry nude than feel me up. Aside from which, the NIR scanners that are still present are safer than the actual plane ride. I mean, NIR is lower energy than visible light. I don't fly much (1-2x a year) and I think that the TSA should probably just change its name to Minipeace and be done with it, but I'm still taking getting looked at vs getting groped.
It's funny how people feel really differently about this. I've known a lot of people who had a much more visceral reaction to being touched, whereas I have that to going through the machine. The one time I went through it was because I was too close to my flight time to risk waiting for the opt-out, and standing there in position with my arms over my head, I was sobbing before I was out of the thing. Soooooo much more visceral for me to stand there, with my hands up, alone, in a little fishbowl. Doesn't bother me at all, however, to be touched (I mean, aside from the fact it bothers me tremendously that any of this happens at all), and that way makes mostly everyone but me uncomfortable.

When I go through with L-dub we have a nicely refined co-picture-taking method as well, especially since a couple years ago they pulled me into a private room for special extra screening and he almost flipped his shit at JFK asking whether I was under arrest and he should call our lawyer, over and over for about half an hour. Now that was a fun time. (Protip for pat-downees: always make sure your screener takes new gloves out of the box and puts them on in front of you. Always.)
Yeah, I nearly had a panic attack the one time I was selected for the groping (after having been through the rapey-scan). I felt uncomfortable and violated, it was awful. If some dude is going to feel my balls, it better be for medical reasons. Or because I'm paying for it.
"i say make some popcorn and give me a blanket to hide this six foot boner i have." --dhex

"The difference between Hodor! and Jeb! is that at the end of the day, one of them gets to stop pretending he's retarded." -- Jasper

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Ellie
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Re: Groping Resistance - Pfft.

Post by Ellie » 07 Jul 2014, 15:58

Rachel wrote:
Mo wrote:
nicole wrote:It's one of those times where it's extra effective to be a little white girl, too. OH NOEZ LOOK HOW DANGEROUS SHE IS.
Yeah, I always opt out and it probably only makes people feel better about it, "Look, it's the sketchy bearded Arab guy getting felt up." Maybe it will be better when I travel with Mojito.
I think if you and Mrs. Mo travel with Mojito one of you will have to opt for the pat down anyway? (IIRC you can't go through the X-Ray machine holding a baby) But then Mojito will seem suspicious? TERRORIST BABY!!!
n=1, when I flew with Admin Baby they directed us away from the Rapeyscan and it was metal detector + hand swab on the way out and speedy don't-take-your-shoes-off lane + metal detector on the way back. No patdown either time.

I do prefer the scan to the patdown. I mean, I hate that either one is there, but whatever, I've had n00ds taken before, here's my fat naked ass, don't touch me.
"NB stands for nota bene do not @ me" - nicole

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