Onion that could've been in The News

User avatar
Aresen
Posts: 13900
Joined: 26 Apr 2010, 20:18
Location: Great White Pacific Northwest

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by Aresen » 15 Dec 2014, 14:01

Taktix® wrote:
Mo wrote:You need a subscription? I don't have one and I saw it fine
I think it's one of those sites where you get like 5 free articles to your IP address before the paywall triggers gently requests you to pay up. Also, I think Canadians are banned from reading the New Yorker via the Smug Importation/Exportation Act of 2009 ...
I can't see it. Tried again and got the 'subscription' thing again.

Maybe it's my computer's Smugwall.
If Trump supporters wanted a tough guy, why did they elect such a whiny bitch? - Mo

Those who know history are doomed to deja vu. - the innominate one

Most people don't realize Stephen King downplayed the horror that is Maine. - Jennifer

User avatar
Eric the .5b
Posts: 11855
Joined: 26 Apr 2010, 16:29

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by Eric the .5b » 15 Dec 2014, 15:07

Try Incognito/Porn Mode. Works for NYT.
"Better that ten guilty persons escape than that one innocent suffer."
"Cyberpunk never really gave the government enough credit for their ability to secure a favorable prenup during the Corporate-State wedding." - Shem

User avatar
thoreau
Posts: 25627
Joined: 06 May 2010, 12:56
Location: Back to the lab again

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by thoreau » 17 Dec 2014, 13:44

"ike Wile E. Coyote salivating over a "4000 Ways To Prepare Roadrunner" cookbook without watching his surroundings, the Road Runner of Societal Inertia snuck up on them both and beepbeeped them off the mesa."
--Shem

User avatar
Warren
Posts: 23617
Joined: 26 Apr 2010, 17:03
Location: Goat Rope MO
Contact:

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by Warren » 17 Dec 2014, 13:48

According to the Oberlin Review, Thomas was subsequently forced to apologize for the email.
Has anyone seen the White Rabbit?
THIS SPACE FOR RENT

User avatar
lunchstealer
Posts: 15492
Joined: 26 Apr 2010, 17:25
Location: The Local Fluff in the Local Bubble

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by lunchstealer » 21 Dec 2014, 17:13

That photo doesn't look like Vani Hari to me:

http://www.theonion.com/articles/woman- ... n-p,35922/
"The constitution is more of a BDSM agreement with a safe word." - Sandy

"Neoliberalism. Austerity. Booga booga!!!!" - JasonL

"We can't confirm rumors that Lynndie England is in the running to be Gina Haspel's personal aide." - DAR

User avatar
thoreau
Posts: 25627
Joined: 06 May 2010, 12:56
Location: Back to the lab again

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by thoreau » 15 Jan 2015, 17:16

"ike Wile E. Coyote salivating over a "4000 Ways To Prepare Roadrunner" cookbook without watching his surroundings, the Road Runner of Societal Inertia snuck up on them both and beepbeeped them off the mesa."
--Shem

User avatar
thoreau
Posts: 25627
Joined: 06 May 2010, 12:56
Location: Back to the lab again

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by thoreau » 12 Feb 2015, 11:05

"ike Wile E. Coyote salivating over a "4000 Ways To Prepare Roadrunner" cookbook without watching his surroundings, the Road Runner of Societal Inertia snuck up on them both and beepbeeped them off the mesa."
--Shem

User avatar
tr0g
Posts: 6584
Joined: 11 May 2011, 10:21
Location: At the shop

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by tr0g » 12 Feb 2015, 14:01

Hey, that's an improvement. Last time, they left that line out.
Yeah but how can you tell at a glance which junk a raccoon is packing? Also, gay raccoons? - Hugh Akston
Nothing you can say is as important as the existence of a functioning marketplace of ideas, go set yourself on fire. - JasonL

User avatar
lunchstealer
Posts: 15492
Joined: 26 Apr 2010, 17:25
Location: The Local Fluff in the Local Bubble

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by lunchstealer » 12 Feb 2015, 14:19

tr0g wrote:
Hey, that's an improvement. Last time, they left that line out.
Well, this interpretation holds for the previous ones:
Legal scholars noted that the proposal’s language intentionally leaves the door open for a future president to extend the authorization by one or more generations as necessary.
"The constitution is more of a BDSM agreement with a safe word." - Sandy

"Neoliberalism. Austerity. Booga booga!!!!" - JasonL

"We can't confirm rumors that Lynndie England is in the running to be Gina Haspel's personal aide." - DAR

User avatar
JasonL
Posts: 22004
Joined: 05 May 2010, 17:22

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by JasonL » 12 Feb 2015, 14:23

Authorized Use of Military in a Quagmire - sign the AUMQ or the terrorists win.

Authorized Use of Military Forever and Ever - it is important for our national security that you all sign the AUMFE ...

User avatar
D.A. Ridgely
Posts: 17818
Joined: 26 Apr 2010, 17:09
Location: The Other Side

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by D.A. Ridgely » 12 Feb 2015, 14:36

Congress should just declare war on "all our enemies" and leave it up to the president who they are.

User avatar
Kolohe
Posts: 13203
Joined: 06 May 2010, 10:51

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by Kolohe » 12 Feb 2015, 15:08

D.A. Ridgely wrote:Congress should just declare war on "all our enemies" and leave it up to the president who they are.
That's more or less what the original AUMF in 2001 said.
when you wake up as the queen of the n=1 kingdom and mount your steed non sequiturius, do you look out upon all you survey and think “damn, it feels good to be a green idea sleeping furiously?" - dhex

User avatar
Aresen
Posts: 13900
Joined: 26 Apr 2010, 20:18
Location: Great White Pacific Northwest

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by Aresen » 12 Feb 2015, 16:17

I, for one, would like to see the doors of the Temple of Janus closed.
If Trump supporters wanted a tough guy, why did they elect such a whiny bitch? - Mo

Those who know history are doomed to deja vu. - the innominate one

Most people don't realize Stephen King downplayed the horror that is Maine. - Jennifer

User avatar
JasonL
Posts: 22004
Joined: 05 May 2010, 17:22

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by JasonL » 12 Feb 2015, 16:56

But they have Bill Gross now!

ETA: this is not investment advice

User avatar
lunchstealer
Posts: 15492
Joined: 26 Apr 2010, 17:25
Location: The Local Fluff in the Local Bubble

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by lunchstealer » 12 Feb 2015, 17:34

JasonL wrote:Authorized Use of Military in a Quagmire - sign the AUMQ or the terrorists win.

Authorized Use of Military Forever and Ever - it is important for our national security that you all sign the AUMFE ...
Authorization for Use of Military Forever Universally - AUM-FU (Someone needs to govspeak a backronym to add "BFYTW")
"The constitution is more of a BDSM agreement with a safe word." - Sandy

"Neoliberalism. Austerity. Booga booga!!!!" - JasonL

"We can't confirm rumors that Lynndie England is in the running to be Gina Haspel's personal aide." - DAR

User avatar
lunchstealer
Posts: 15492
Joined: 26 Apr 2010, 17:25
Location: The Local Fluff in the Local Bubble

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by lunchstealer » 24 Feb 2015, 12:22

"The constitution is more of a BDSM agreement with a safe word." - Sandy

"Neoliberalism. Austerity. Booga booga!!!!" - JasonL

"We can't confirm rumors that Lynndie England is in the running to be Gina Haspel's personal aide." - DAR

User avatar
Aresen
Posts: 13900
Joined: 26 Apr 2010, 20:18
Location: Great White Pacific Northwest

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by Aresen » 24 Feb 2015, 18:30

..medical personnel rushed to revive the man so they could proceed with the execution, but it was already too late.
Was he post-humously charged with Unauthorized Death While in Custody?
If Trump supporters wanted a tough guy, why did they elect such a whiny bitch? - Mo

Those who know history are doomed to deja vu. - the innominate one

Most people don't realize Stephen King downplayed the horror that is Maine. - Jennifer

User avatar
thoreau
Posts: 25627
Joined: 06 May 2010, 12:56
Location: Back to the lab again

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by thoreau » 24 Feb 2015, 18:39

The guards started beating him as soon as he showed signs of a stroke. During the beating they shouted "Stop resisting the execution!"
"ike Wile E. Coyote salivating over a "4000 Ways To Prepare Roadrunner" cookbook without watching his surroundings, the Road Runner of Societal Inertia snuck up on them both and beepbeeped them off the mesa."
--Shem

User avatar
thoreau
Posts: 25627
Joined: 06 May 2010, 12:56
Location: Back to the lab again

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by thoreau » 25 Feb 2015, 21:49

Not actually the Onion, but close enough:

ISIS Hosts Pizza Party With Italian Homosexuals; Admits They Are Pretty Fun Crowd
At press time, ISIS officials plan to meet with the largest gay community in Rome tomorrow when they visit with members of the Roman Curia.
"ike Wile E. Coyote salivating over a "4000 Ways To Prepare Roadrunner" cookbook without watching his surroundings, the Road Runner of Societal Inertia snuck up on them both and beepbeeped them off the mesa."
--Shem

User avatar
thoreau
Posts: 25627
Joined: 06 May 2010, 12:56
Location: Back to the lab again

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by thoreau » 08 Mar 2015, 11:36

"ike Wile E. Coyote salivating over a "4000 Ways To Prepare Roadrunner" cookbook without watching his surroundings, the Road Runner of Societal Inertia snuck up on them both and beepbeeped them off the mesa."
--Shem

User avatar
thoreau
Posts: 25627
Joined: 06 May 2010, 12:56
Location: Back to the lab again

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by thoreau » 16 Mar 2015, 16:06

"ike Wile E. Coyote salivating over a "4000 Ways To Prepare Roadrunner" cookbook without watching his surroundings, the Road Runner of Societal Inertia snuck up on them both and beepbeeped them off the mesa."
--Shem

User avatar
D.A. Ridgely
Posts: 17818
Joined: 26 Apr 2010, 17:09
Location: The Other Side

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by D.A. Ridgely » 16 Mar 2015, 16:21

I posted that on Livre de Visages a few days ago and some of the comments I received make a strong case against the universal franchise.

User avatar
tr0g
Posts: 6584
Joined: 11 May 2011, 10:21
Location: At the shop

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by tr0g » 16 Mar 2015, 18:11

D.A. Ridgely wrote:
I posted that on Livre de Visages a few days ago and some of the comments I received make a strong case against the universal franchise.
Talking to people usually makes a strong case against universal franchise, or a strong case for a far more limited government.
Yeah but how can you tell at a glance which junk a raccoon is packing? Also, gay raccoons? - Hugh Akston
Nothing you can say is as important as the existence of a functioning marketplace of ideas, go set yourself on fire. - JasonL

User avatar
thoreau
Posts: 25627
Joined: 06 May 2010, 12:56
Location: Back to the lab again

Re: Onion that could've been in The News

Post by thoreau » 24 Mar 2015, 01:26

"ike Wile E. Coyote salivating over a "4000 Ways To Prepare Roadrunner" cookbook without watching his surroundings, the Road Runner of Societal Inertia snuck up on them both and beepbeeped them off the mesa."
--Shem


Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 6 guests